Life at a Crossroad

It's late and I can't sleep.  It's been a long week.  Work has been extraordinarily difficult...those of you who know me and my work ethic know I don't do anything 50% or even 80%.  I give it my all.  But there is no more to give.  I am done.

At what point do you say enough is enough?  My job is no longer what I signed up for...in addition to my responsibilities, I've become the following:
IT guru
assistant director
director
narcotic police
scheduler
forms nazi (yes we have a committee to approve forms)
relief pharmacist
bar coding expert - I may have a second career at the local supermarket
drug shortage specialist (like I have all the secret recipes to make drugs)
morality police
billing dept
social worker - apparently my extension is where you get taxi cab vouchers
department shrink

I was hoping that with the new director coming some of these responsibilities would go away but with each passing day, I am losing confidence that the load will be any lighter.  In fact, it appears that more and more is coming in and the velocity at which the work is coming in is about 4 x of what is going out.  This is not sustainable and there's over 60 days worth of work on my desk right now.  I know I sound like a whiner but you really have no idea.

I now know what a stomach ulcer feels like.

I am torn because I am always at work or worried about work...the part that tears me up the most is that I am allowing work to rob time away from my community, my volunteer work, my concerns with Africa - I have no time to give these more important causes the time they deserve.

I've been looking for a while now and there's an attractive job offer away from Nashville and life is literally at a crossroad.  The pay is quite a bit less but I can live with that.  But I will miss my friends and if you know me, my "home" is here.  I worry about the patients and the people I work with (but not those I work for really), and I say it in the most humble way.  They will be fine without me but there will be a few rough patches and the place won't be the same.  I feel like a loser to walk away but then and again I didn't sign up for this - the rules of the game were changed somewhere in the middle.  This new job does allow me to start over and build something up from scratch again, stopping the stagnancy in my life.

I am so confused and frustrated.  I don't know what to do.  Do I stick around until something changes or is it time to jump ship?

Comments

[Katie Holliday]

Oh no...you and Jen in one week...that would be hard for the pharmacist at the Parthenon!!!  I think we would all be kidding ourselves if we said that we did not see this coming...we can see how you are overloaded and no one can work like that for any extended period of time especially when it consumes all of you.  I would be so sad to see you go, but would also completely understand.  I will support you either way!  Pray about it Steve...I praying too!